I haven’t made any selections which can be 100% engraved in stone at this level, however since lots of you could have stated through the years that you simply take pleasure in it after I share my thought processes, let me begin at the start and let you know what has transpired during the last two days.
As I suspected, the emotional breakdown over our ruined dwelling gymnasium ground and subfloor lastly got here. In the event you missed that saga, you may learn this post after which this post. It began with me being pouty, feeling sorry for myself, and albeit, being a bit passive aggressive. And that’s not like me in any respect. I’m speaking particularly concerning the passive aggressive half. There’s usually nothing passive about my aggression after I get indignant or upset about one thing. 😀
However it began two nights in the past when Matt was already enjoyable in mattress, and I felt the load of all of the information these days got here bearing down on me. First, the $21,000 for the entire dwelling generator. After which the 1000’s (I’m undecided precisely how a lot but) for the entire dwelling dehumidifier that Matt actually needs. After which the house gymnasium ground and subfloor. After which I began getting upset and feeling sorry for myself. I dragged my unhappy butt into the bed room, feeling so sorry for myself that you simply’d assume an precise tragedy had occurred, and I stated in my most passive aggressive method, “Properly, I assume we’ll simply NEVER get that addition, will we?” Poor Matt. 😀 He’s had 22 years of coping with me (and I with him and his idiosyncrasies), so he is aware of easy methods to discuss me down from the ledge after I get like that. And after about half-hour of speaking, I had calmed down. He had assured me that if I wished that addition, I might have that addition. We’d make it work.
And simply so we’re clear, that is the addition I’m speaking about. For years now, we’ve been planning on including onto our home with an addition that measures roughly 1000 sq. toes and features a new laundry room, household/media room, and master suite with a big walk-in closet. After it’s completed, the home would appear to be this.
However after throwing my little mood tantrum, and even after Matt had calmed me down and I felt significantly better, that thought had been planted in my mind. What if we didn’t do the addition?
That was onerous to consider. In any case, we’ve been speaking about and planning that addition for years! I’ve dreamed about it. I’ve put a lot time and thought into the ground plan till I had precisely what I wished. I’ve met with the builder. I’ve met with the architect. We had been nonetheless planning on beginning that addition this yr.
Or had been we? I imply, it’s already the center of July, and nothing has been accomplished. The architect that’s allegedly drawing up our plans has been M.I.A. for months now, and I’ve made no efforts to get in contact with him and light-weight a hearth underneath him to get our plans accomplished. Why is that? Matt has instructed me repeatedly that we will begin the addition instantly. Actually, any time now. Simply at any time when I’m prepared.
So if this addition is so vital to me, why have I not been extra proactive in ensuring issues are transferring forward with it? I’ve been completely completely satisfied to remain in “planning mode” for years now, and although I’ve the inexperienced gentle to maneuver ahead at any time when I need to, I nonetheless haven’t accomplished it.
So yesterday, I made a decision to get actually sincere with myself as a result of there’s one thing there, and I don’t assume it’s important to be a skilled psychologist to see that. I’m the one hindering the progress, and I’ve to be actually sincere with myself as to why that’s. And it comes down to 2 issues…cash and area.
First, let’s discuss concerning the area. Matt and I are solely two folks. And but, whereas our home isn’t big, it’s already fairly sprawled out. In truth, one pal who came to visit didn’t understand that the door within the sitting room led to a different very massive room (i.e., my studio). The primary time he noticed what was past that door, he stated, “My goodness, Kristi, your home is just like the TARDIS!” (Bonus factors if you realize the reference.) And it sort of is. From one finish to the opposite, it sort of appears to go on and on. New lands, and new adventures await as you move by means of every doorway. 😀
After which there’s the cash concern. The estimate that the builder gave me got here to $226,358.90, and that’s earlier than we determined so as to add on an extra 200 sq. toes in order that we might push the again wall of the addition again far sufficient to make room for a big walk-in closet in the master suite, in addition to different storage that we would wish for Matt’s objects (i.e., Hoyer raise, bathe wheelchair, and so forth.). At an estimated $200 per sq. foot, that will increase the fee one other $40,000. That’s nearly $270,000.
I imply, that quantity astounds me. After we first began speaking concerning the addition a few years in the past, the quantity that the very first contractor gave me was $70,000. That was pre-COVID, earlier than provide line disruptions, and earlier than the inflation from these issues made the worth of nearly all the things skyrocket. We went from an estimate of $70,000 to an estimate of $270,000 within the span of about eight years. And naturally, that price ticket doesn’t even embody any furnishings, decor, plumbing fixtures, or customizations that I’d need to do (i.e., the nicer trim that I like and issues like that).
I simply don’t even know the way I can justify spending that a lot cash on this home so as to add on extra room and make this home even greater and extra sprawling for simply two folks. I received’t go as far as to say it’s an ethical concern, as a result of it’s not likely that. (And I don’t need to come throughout as passing judgment on others who reside in even bigger homes with all types of facilities. They will do no matter they need with their cash with no judgment from me.) However for us, for our state of affairs, for our home, for our neighborhood, it simply feels…icky. I don’t even know the way else to explain it. It feels icky in my thoughts. And it’s that feeling that has been holding me again.
However the place does that depart us? As a result of proper now, our ground plan appears like this, and this has all the time been “progress” in my thoughts. I’ve by no means as soon as thought-about this anyplace close to “completed”.
That tiny little room behind the grasp lavatory is the unique grasp lavatory. It’s not even accessible from inside the home anymore. It’s simply been sitting there, connected to the home however inaccessible, and ready to be demolished. After which there’s the sunroom. Whereas that room is the place the washer, dryer, and scorching water heater presently reside, the room itself isn’t salvageable. It was not constructed correctly, and it will possibly’t be redone. The one choice is to tear it down. It can not keep. Interval.
So yesterday, I had one other down day. That’s when the tears got here. I wasn’t feeling indignant anymore. My passive aggression had dissipated. I used to be simply feeling unhappy. Blue. Discouraged. I used to be feeling like this home had lastly overwhelmed me. So I sat down at my desk within the studio, opened up my laptop computer, pulled up our ground plan on my photograph enhancing program, and simply began enjoying round to see what I might give you. And I noticed that we do, in actual fact, have some very cheap, doable choices.
First, there’s the obvious answer to offer us an even bigger bed room. If we’ve to switch the ground and the subfloor within the dwelling gymnasium, that will be the proper time to take away what stays of the unique closets from that room. That might sq. up the room, take away these visible boundaries, and make the room fairly a bit greater. And because it’s connected to the grasp lavatory, it will naturally be our master suite. The bonus is that it’s the brightest room in the entire home. I like the pure gentle that pours into that room each morning.
After which the present visitor bed room (which is the room we’re presently utilizing as our bed room) may very well be cut up into two areas, with one changing into the laundry room accessible from the hallway, and the opposite changing into a big walk-in closet accessible from the bed room.
It might principally take the home again to its unique footprint. In the event you’ll bear in mind, the again wall that you simply see in that ground plan simply above is the unique again wall of the home. That’s why the again wall of the kitchen initially had a window in it. By the point we purchased the home, the sunroom had been added. However that window was initially an exterior window.
And that’s additionally the rationale the unique hallway lavatory had a window in it. Once more, by the point we purchased the home, that window seemed into the sunroom. And since we deliberate so as to add on from the start, I eliminated the window after I reworked this lavatory.
But when we don’t do the addition, I might truly put a window again in that room! That rest room might have pure daylight once more!! That thought alone makes me giddy.
At that time of enjoying round with the ground plan, I believed I had misplaced my thoughts. In any case, if I had been to maneuver ahead with this plan, that implies that we might have turned what was initially a three-bedroom home right into a ONE-bedroom home.
A ONE-BEDROOM HOUSE.
That was nearly an excessive amount of of a hurdle for me. Might I truly try this? Might I flip this home right into a one-bedroom home? Folks would assume I used to be loopy! They’d assume I’ve utterly misplaced my thoughts. Have I misplaced my thoughts? Is that essentially the most insane factor {that a} home-owner has ever accomplished? I imply, would we ever be capable of promote a one-bedroom home?
After which I caught myself. My goodness, I used to be doing the very same factor I’ve been preaching in opposition to for 17 years now! I actually just wrote a blog post about this very subject solely days in the past!! There I used to be, making an attempt to determine how this home might be personalized to finest swimsuit our wants, and I used to be anxious about what some anonymous, faceless, unknown, potential future purchaser could take into consideration my selections. However Matt and I purchased this home as our perpetually dwelling. We’re those who paid the mortgage. We’re those who paid off the mortgage. We’re those who personal this home. We’re those who reside right here. We’re those who must be comfy right here. It’s our wants and desires which can be vital when making selections about this home. And the way might I encourage others to cease designing and adorning for that potential future proprietor if I can’t even do it myself?
So after giving it a ton of thought, I truly gave myself permission to go there and to be okay with it. I in some way managed to be okay with the thought of a one-bedroom home.
However, in fact, these adjustments didn’t resolve all of our issues. I nonetheless need a eating desk someplace. Matt nonetheless wants his Theracycle, and I don’t actually need to hand over my rebounder or treadmill (though, I’m open to promoting my present one and getting a a lot smaller one). So whereas we don’t want a complete bed room devoted to being a house gymnasium, having a spot for these three issues is non-negotiable.
So I began enjoying round extra. After which I believed, “What if we simply add on a laundry room?” So I began searching for a spot to place a laundry room, and the proper place for it gave the impression to be proper behind the kitchen. And similar to that, one other downside solved itself. If I put a door from the wheelchair ramp into the laundry room, that makes bringing in groceries a lot simpler! And the entire “from the storage by means of the laundry room to the kitchen” format is a reasonably widespread one.
And with that format, I wouldn’t have to chop the present visitor bed room into two. I might hold it one huge room that may very well be half closet and half exercise space, and the center may very well be left open to retailer Matt’s huge objects once they’re not in use. I truly spent fairly a little bit of time trying to find issues like “combo closet and exercise space” and “walk-in closet and residential gymnasium mixture“. Whereas I didn’t discover a lot, I did discover a couple of examples of individuals combining these issues.
After all, each time I solved one factor, it created one other downside. If I add on a laundry room and switch the breakfast room again right into a breakfast room in order that I can have the desk I would like, the place does Matt sit and watch TV throughout the day?
So I saved on enjoying round, and I lastly eliminated the entire partitions between the present kitchen, present sitting room, and potential future laundry room. After which I eliminated the labels from these areas in order that I might see them as a clean area. I additionally eliminated the label from the pantry simply because I’m open to new potentialities.
And that’s just about the place I left it. However I can let you know that I really feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I used to be truly so enthusiastic about this that I had a tough time sleeping final evening. I feel I lastly drifted off round 2:00am, after which I awakened at 5:30 fascinated about it once more, excited concerning the potentialities. I wasn’t simply fascinated about the probabilities for these areas, however I used to be additionally fascinated about what this might free us as much as do. It might free us as much as have our driveway poured instantly! It might free us as much as construct my workshop within the very close to future. It might free us as much as go forward and construct the deck or patio or no matter we’re going to placed on the again of the home in order that we will truly begin having fun with our yard. And we might do all of that with out going into debt. No debt. I like the thought of that. There’s a lot freedom in that. Sufficient freedom, in actual fact, to make the thought of residing in a one-bedroom home sound very nice.
So I’m nonetheless fascinated about it. I’m going to be doing an entire lot of praying about it. And I’m not going to stress myself to hurry to any selections. I need to do what feels peaceable, and I’m not 100% of the best way there with any of the choices I’ve thought-about but. However I’ll positively let y’all know after I get there.
Addicted 2 Adorning is the place I share my DIY and adorning journey as I transform and enhance the 1948 fixer higher that my husband, Matt, and I purchased in 2013. Matt has M.S. and is unable to do bodily work, so I do nearly all of the work on the home on my own. You can learn more about me here.
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